The Dye
by willbobshaloem
Summary: Bella dyes her hair. Alice takes her to the mall to fix it and then see what happens! Complete!
1. The Color

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight, obviosly. If I did, do you really think I'd be writing fanfictions about it instead of another book? And the personal lab rat thing was said by my friend, so I give her credit for that. And the story was kind of her idea, as well. She was dying her hair at the time, or we were talking about it, or something like that. Well, either way.

* * *

"Edward, please!" Bella yelled from the room that she was locked in. 

"What?" Edward called. She could tell he was smirking at her reaction.

"Don't you dare come any closer to me!" She yelled.

"Why not?" He asked, walking closer to the door. She could hear him so well, even with his light footsteps. Then he knocked so lightly, she wasn't sure if she had really heard it.

"Back away!"

"What's wrong?" He asked, still obviously smirking.

"Don't let her come near me!" Bella yelled.

"Aww, why not?" Alice asked, hurt. "That hurts, Bella, right here." Alice stated, pointing to her hea- where her heart would be.

"It's _that_ bad!" Bella cried.

"It can't be!" Edward called to her through the door.

"It is!"

"Fine, just let me in!" Alice stated.

"Fine, but no Edward!" She knew there would be no convincing them entirely, so why not compromise?

"But I-" Edward began.

"NO!" Bella yelled.

"Fine…" Edward said as Bella opened the door slightly for the tiny Alice to squeeze through.

"Wow…" was all Alice said.

"Shut up! I know!"

"No, it's not that bad! We'll just have to fix it…"

"How?"

"Going to a hair salon!"

"Oh, God!" That's right. Bella dyed her hair. Well, _attempted_ to dye it. It didn't work well. Instead of her brunette hair, it's was now cotton-candy blue.

"Why _did_ you dye it anyway?" Alice asked, as if she didn't already know from Edward's power of hearing her thoughts.

"As if you don't already know!" Bella cried. Even though Edward couldn't read her mind, he read Charlie's and everyone else's minds that saw her.

Alice smirked. "I want to hear it in your own words."

"Charlie was out for the night and I got bored. Well, I always wanted blue hair…"

"Why?"

"Um… I have no clue…?" Before Bella could even move, there was a flash in her face, as Alice took her picture with a digital camera.

"ALICE! Delete that, NOW!" Bella screamed.

"Hm… nope! Now, let's go get this fixed!" Alice replied chipperly.

"…Fine. But we are not going shopping!"

"Oh, yes, we are!"

"I am not being your personal lab rat again!" Bella shuddered at the memory of prom.

"Too bad!" Alice laughed. There was no getting out of this now.

"Just make sure Edward can't see me! Please!" Bella begged. This would be fun.

"Alright, alright. Edward, get out!"

Edward mumbled something that Bella couldn't hear, but Alice did. "What? You shut up! It's your fault! Maybe if you weren't so-"

"What?" Bella asked, interrupting Alice. "What's his fault?"

"Nothing." Alice replied quickly.

As they were walking out to Alice's car, they saw Emmett. There was no way that by the time she got to the mall, the whole house wouldn't know from either seeing her or Edward.

"What did you do to your hair, Bella?" Emmett asked, laughing.

"Shut… up…" Bella replied. "I know how bad it looks. I don't need to hear it again!"

"How can I, while I'm looking at _that_! What did Edward say?"

"He didn't see it!" Bella was now blushing furiously from her embarrassing hair dye. "Nor will he ever!"

"Psh, yes he will!" Alice stated.

"No, he won't. You'd better delete that picture now!"

"Good thing, too! Now, where are you taking her, Alice?"

"To get this fixed." Alice replied. "And shopping!"

"Good luck, Bella. You'll need it." Emmett laughed as he started to walk away slowly. Well, slowly for a vampire. But he was still too fast for a human to even begin to compare to it.

"I know. Thanks." Bella replied dully. "I do NOT want to go shopping!"

"Too bad! Well, come on! Let's go!" Alice whined.

"Fine." Bella replied as they got into the car.

The 4 hour car ride to the Northgate Mall took less than half an hour. Bella spent the time trying to fix the hat on her head so on one could see her hair when they got there. Alice was chatting away happily about what she was going to buy Bella, while Bella told her she would buy nothing for her. They fought about that for the whole ride there.

"Here we are!" Alice called excitedly as she parked the car and stepped out. As soon as Bella was out, they walked to the entrance, Alice at human pace, so they didn't attract any other unwanted attention.

"Oh, God, please don't let it be them!" Bella whined out loud, looking at the ceiling as she saw two people she thought she might know… and hoped that she didn't.

"Who?" Alice asked. "Where?"

"Those two, right there!" Bella cried, pointing to the two figures walking towards them.


	2. Teagan, Eowyn, and Ro

Disclaimer: Still, I don't own Twilight. And I forgot to mention in the last one, I don't own Northgate Mall. Nor do I own ghettoness, Liz, or Emily. They are real people (with the exception of the ghettoness).

Bella's pov.

"Hey, Bella!" The girl said as she approached her and Alice. "Hi, er… Alice."

"Hello." Alice replied.

"Hi, Bella." The guys said.

"Um… hi, Jessica and Mike. What's up?" _Why are they here?_ I thought. _Why today, of all days?_

"Nothing." Jessica replied. "We were here with Angela and Lauren, but they went off alone. What about you?"

"Um… shopping…" I replied, almost a question.

"Is that a blue streak in your hair, Bella?"

Alice tried not to snort out a laugh. I mentally told her to shut up, even though she's not the one who can read minds, and shot her a look that said "Shut up." I think she got the hint. "Um… yeah…. You like it?"

"Not sure yet… Take off the hat."

"I can't!" I cried, defensively.

"Um… why?" Jess asked, very confused.

"Really, really, really, _really_ bad hair day." Alice stated before I could think of and answer.

"Oh, okay. Show me on Monday in Trig, 'kay?" She asked.

"Yeah, defiantly." I stated. Like I was keeping the blue in… Any of the blue in…

"Okay. Hey, you wanna hang out?"

"Um… I can't right now, but later, okay?"

"Yeah, if we can find you." Jess laughed. I was hoping that we wouldn't run into each other later.

"Yeah, we should." Mike stated, awkwardly. I don't think he really wanted to be around me and Jess at the same time, alone. I think he still likes me more than Jess. I wish I could read minds right now…

"Yeah, we will. Gotta go. See you guys later?" I replied quickly.

"Of course, defiantly." Jess stated.

Alice and I walked away quickly. "Let's _not_ find them later, or Angela and Lauren, okay?"

"Fine." Alice replied. "Let's go fix your hair."

"Yeah, let's do that. Now." I stuttered out. Why am I so stupid? Dying my hair blue? What is wrong with me?

As we walked into the hair salon, I, being me, and all, tripped over a stool. I fell into three girls chatting idlely by.

"Teagan! You idiot! What did you do now!" one of the girls yelled. She was the tannest and the shortest. She had red-purple hair.

"Nothing! It's your fault, Eowyn!" The girl, known as Teagan yelled. She was pale. Not vampirically pale, but pale nonetheless. She was the middle of their heights. She had dirty blonde hair.

"Oh, shut up!" the third yelled. She was the tallest, obviously athletic, with strawberry blonde hair.

"Psh, Ro. Psh. Bitch!" Teagan said.

"What? Who shoved a tampon up your ass?" The other two yelled in unison.

"Mmhmm! You shut up."

"Loser, much?" Ro said.

"Yes, you know it, and I'm proud. You know you just jealous of my ghetto-ness! Yo!" Teagan replied with some… "ghetto" moves.

"O...kay… we're just gonna go now…" Ro said.

"Don't be hatin'. You can't handle all this ghetto-ness!"

"Word!" Eowyn yelled as she did some ghetto hand gestures. I was so confused.

"Um… sorry about falling into you three…" I said awkwardly after they were done with their… moves and fight.

"Huh? Oh, no, not your fault. All Teagan's." Two of the girls said.

"Why is it always my fault?" Teagan asked, fake annoyed. It was obvious that she didn't really care.

"Because we said so." Ro stated.

"I hate you guys…" Teagan sulked. "Hi! I'm Teagan, by the way!" Teagan yelled excitedly.

"HI! I'm Alice and this is Bella!" Alice excitedly stated.

"This is Ro and Eowyn." Teagan said, pointing to each.

"Hi." They both said in unison. "You point too much, T."

"Are you two twins?" I asked Ro and Teagan.

"Oh, God! Not another person!" Teagan whined.

"No, we're not even related." Ro stated.

"Oh… you look alike."

"Why? Why does everyone think that?" Teagan mumbled to herself. "I don't get it! Anyways… What are you doing here?"

"Getting her hair… fixed." Alice stated, unsure of which words to use.

"Dyed it blue and it looks bad?"

"Yeah…" I mumbled, looking down "Hence the hat. How'd you know that, anyway?"

"I did that last week." Teagan replied, smiling the memory. "Still have some of the blue in it… Somewhere…"

You really are a loser, T." The others said.

"And?" Teagan replied, obviously uncaring despite her friends' insults.

"What are you guys doing?"

"Getting my roots done." Eowyn replied.

"We're stalking." Teagan said.

"Cool, cool." I replied to the short, red-purple haired girl. She did look familiar to me, however. They all did. I was wondering where I might have seen them. School? In the town? Maybe I was just thinking of someone else who looked similar to them.

"Wait, what?" I asked, slightly alarmed at her so-relaxed response. It seemed odd to me, but that's just me.

"Yeah, we're stalking. We do that… Well, Teagan does that. Not so much me. I just get stalked." Ro stated.

"Oh…" I was slightly confused.

"Bella?" I heard Alice say.

"Hmmm? Sorry. Thinking." _Where I know them from_. I added to myself.

"Riight." Alice stated, looking at me strangely.

"Have we met before?" I asked them as me and Eowyn sat down in a chair to get our hair done.

"I don't remember it." Teagan stated.

Ro and Eowyn stared at her. "Is that suprising to you? At all?"

"Nope."

"Good. But, I don't know. I think I might have seen you somewhere…"Eowyn answered me.

"Dude! Look!" Teagan yelled, pointing.

"What? Who? Where?"

"It's Emily and Liz."

"Oh God!" Ro yelled out.

"Can I beat one of them? Please?" Teagan asked eagarly. I'm not even sure who or why she was asking.

"Can I help?" Eowyn asked, excitedly.

"Hell yeah!" Teagan yelled.

"Um… what?" I asked, confused beyond belief.

"They are two of the biggest bitches in out school. We hate them. They love Ro here. It's kinda creepy, actually." Teagan explained to me.

Ro added, "Yeah, it is."

"Oh." I said.

"Yeah. They're whores. With their Hollister and Abercrombie and Fitch. Bullshit…" Eowyn stated vaguely as she rambled on about them, mumbling. Then she smiled.

"What?" Teagan and Ro asked suspiciously.

"They're coming over here."

"And?"

"Oh, nothing." Eowyn stated. "You guys wanna help me with a plan?"

I wasn't exactly sure who she was talking to. And I was wondering what the "plan" was.


	3. The Plan, part 1

Disclaimer: I still do not own Twilight. Or Northgate Mall. Neither of the owners will sell to me. It's unfortunate. And everything Liz and /or Emily say is actually how they talk. That's not made up. Well, most of it's not. Nor do I own Mission Impossible moves. Nor do I own My Fair Lady.

**Bella's POV.**

"What are we doing?" Teagan asked. "I'll help. But what are we doing?"

"Oh, you'll see." Eowyn stated slyly.

"Tell me! Tell me, tell me, tell me!" Teagan whined.

"No! Not yet!"

"Fine!"

I was wondering what her plan was going to be and if it involved me or Alice at all. Great, met a person for the first time ever and you're already helping their plans that are probably something bad. Great way to make friends.

"You wanna help, Bella and Alice?" Eowyn asked us.

"Depends wha-" I began.

"Yes! We'll help! Trust me, Bella." Alice stated.

"Now, would I EVER bet against you, Alice?"

"Better not."

"Never would."

"Good."

Ro then said, "What are you going to do, E? And am I helping in any way?"

"Yes, and you'll see!"

Then two girls came over. I assumed they were Liz and Emily.

"Hey, Megan! Catherine, Kayleigh." They both called. I and Alice were very confused.

"Shoot me." The three whispered in unison.

"Hi." Ro and Eowyn said. Teagan mumbled something then turned to me and Alice. Alice started to laugh, so I looked at her.

She whispered, "She just told them 'fuck off, whores.'" I started to laugh, too.

I asked, "So what's with Megan, Catherine, Kayleigh?"

"That's what they know us as. We prefer our other names, if you don't mind." Teagan explained.

"But, who's who?"

"I'm Catherine. Ro is Megan and Eowyn is Kayleigh. T, R, and E are our names. Don't call us by our other names. Please."

"Okay."

"Like, oh, my God, Megan! That is such a pretty shirt! Where'd you get it?" I heard one of them ask. "And, Catherine! Where'd you get that hat?"

"Um… I don't… remember…" Megan, or rather Ro, responded. She obviously didn't like them very much.

"I'd kill myself before I told you." Catherine, or rather Teagan, stated, walking towards them.

I heard Alice laughing behind me. I turned around and asked, "What is so funny?"

"I know what they're going to do to them." Alice stated.

"What?"

"I can't tell! Not yet, anyway. But trust me; it'll be funny and worse than your hair."

"Hey! Wait, how could anything be worse than this!" I asked, pointing to my hat.

"Oh, trust me, it is." Alice stated slyly.

**Eowyn's POV.**

"So what are you guys doing here?" Ro asked, as if we hadn't heard them talking about it the other day. But it was good to know that they definitely were.

"Getting our hair dyed." Liz answered.

"Cool." Then two hair-dying ladies came over and sat them down.

I went over to Alice and Bella. "Can you distract the hair dying ladies, please?"

"Wh-" Bella began.

"Yes!" Alice interrupted her with a quick glance that seemed faster than humanly possible.

"Good. Thanks."

"Of course!"

"Teagan, come with me and Ro, you keep talking to them."

"But, why do I have to?" Ro whispered harshly, obviously angry that I was making her stay with them.

"Because they like _you_ not us." I stated. It was true. They hated me and T, but loved Ro.

"I hate you so much right now… You have no idea…"

"It'll be worth it if this goes right! Now, come on, T!"

"Coming, coming." Teagan said happily as she walked towards me. She was practically skipping, and I had a feeling she would be soon. She's odd like that.

**Alice's POV.**

"Um, excuse me?" I asked one of the ladies and Bella did the same to the other.\

"Yes?" She asked, obviously annoyed at being interrupted right before she was about to get to work on their hair.

"My friend, Bella, over there, "I began, pointing to Bella, "Really, really needs her hair dyed. I mean, she dyed her hair last night, and it's _horrible_. I mean, utterly atrocious. It makes me _sick_ just to look at her hair!"

"Hey!" I heard Bella say. "Can you let up on me, just a little?"

"No. It's horrible."

"What color did she dye it?" the lady asked, now interested.

"Cotton-candy blue." I stated.

"Oh, dear God! Why? Why?" she exclaimed. She was going to help. And, being me, I knew that for a fact. "Come now, what was it? Bella? Yes, Bella. Come on! Gail, get me the dye!"

"Yes, Penny! I'll be right there!"

"Thank you, so much!" Bella exclaimed, just as I told her to.

"Um... what about us?" Liz or Emily exclaimed. I wasn't sure who was who.

"Oh, shut up! Your hair is not an emergency!" I said to them. They looked in shock, liked they'd be punched in the face. "Hers is! So, shush!"

"Oh, my God! How dare you-"

But, before they got to finish their sentence, I was already gone. I went to stand by Bella as they fixed her way-too-blue hair. I whispered to Penny to leave a streak or two in. She looked at me oddly, but complied, easily enough, after I explained that it's what Bella wanted. Well, it _is_. Sorta… She's the one who dyed her hair blue! So she must have wanted it, somewhat.

"What color is your natural color?" Gail asked.

"Brunette."

"Okay. You want it to be that?" Penny asked. I knew the answer. The only question was, would it turn out good after they re-dye it? I didn't want to spoil it for Bella.

"Yes!" Bella exclaimed. "Alice, come here for a second."

"Yes?" I asked. She was going to ask if it turns out well.

"Will this turn out well?" See?

"I want you to be surprised."

"What! That means bad, doesn't it? Doesn't it?" She exclaimed. I think I was depressing her right now.

"You'll just have to wait and see like a normal person!"

"But I'm not normal! I have a vamp-" She stopped mid-sentence, so no one thought we were crazy, by having a vampire boyfriend. Or by being a vampire. That was always a problem for me…. "Nevermind…"

And so the re-dying began…

**Eowyn's POV.**

"Hurry up, Teagan!" I called.

"I'm coming, I'm coming!" she called back.

"What took you so long?" I exclaimed.

"Have you ever tried stealing hair dye? Not so easy with all these people around!" She exclaimed. "It was hard getting into the backroom without anyone noticing! I had to do it all Mission Impossible style, with the music too!"

"What?"

"I hummed it." She stated happily.

"You loser!"

"So? But, um, yeah, I got the stuff… How much you willing to pay for it?" She said as she hid the "stuff" in her jacket, all drug-dealer-on-the-street-looking-for-customers style.

"What colors did you get? You really are a loser…"

"Let's see… lime green, neon orange, purple, bright red, pink, neon yellow… hmm… oh! And my blue from last week."

"Perfect! Good job, T… for once…" I mumbled the last part.

"Hey! I heard that! If you must know, I happen to be an exc-"

"Hey, shut up! Yell at me later. Let's get this done first." I interrupted her.

"…Fine. What colors?"

"I think that lime green and bright red would be loverly."

"Stop getting all "My Fair Lady" on me. And, I just happen to agree with you. I also think that purple and orange would be quite grand, wouldn't you say?" Teagan asked.

"Okay, dude, stop talking like that. You're creeping me out. And yes, it would be quite marvelous."

"So, how are we doing this?" T asked. I wasn't really sure. I actually had no clue.

"Um…Well, okay. Here's the plan…"

**Teagan's POV**

I listened intently as she told me her plan. I had to admit, it was pretty good. I think it'll work. I can only hope….


	4. Author's Note

A/N: I am really stuck on this story, so if you have any ideas, please help. Great, 3 chapters in on my first story and I'm stuck. That's pretty sad, even for me. I'm working on chapter four and am about half way done, but I have some serious writes block. Really not a good sign, but I promise I'll update as soon as possile. And sorry for making you think that this was a new chapter.


	5. The plan, part 2

Disclaimer: I still do not own Twilight. Or Northgate Mall. Neither of the owners will sell to me. It's unfortunate. And everything Liz and /or Emily say is actually how they talk. That's not made up. Well, most of it's not. Nor do I own the Pink Panther. Or the strangling caused by it. (That's owned by Thursday Pollum). Nor do I own the "cape kid." He's real too. And Home Skillet biscuit is from another friend.

**Ro's POV.**

"Oh, my God! Do you believe this? Ugh." Emily said.

"I know! This is so unfair!" Liz complained.

All I could think was _shut up! OH, just shut up already! _Then I saw two people walking over towards us…

**Teagan's POV.**

"This is perfect!" I whispered to E. Just then, her cell phone rang.

"Shit! I have to go!" she whispered back.

"What?" I asked.

"My job!"

"Shit!"

"I'll get Alice!"

"Yeah! You think she'll help?"

"I hope so…"

"Me too…" I whispered. As E left to go get Alice, Ro stared at me. I shrugged. Soon, Alice walked over.

"Are you gonna help, Alice?"

"Yes!" she exclaimed. I could tell she was excited. It was pretty obvious.

"Thank you so much!" I stated happily.

"Of course!"

"Hello!" I stated happily as we walked over to Liz and Emily. "What can I help you three girls with today?"

"They're getting their hair dyed." Ro stated as she eyed us. I had quickly gotten random clothes from E's job next door. I didn't look like I usually did. I was in a pink skirt with a pink striped shirt and I had a black wig on. It was very… odd.

"What color, ladies?" Alice asked.

"Um… that one." Emily said, pointing to a light-red, dark-blond color.

"For both of you?" They agreed. "Alright. Just give me one moment. Why don't you sit down in those two chairs, right there?" We went in the "back" to get the dyes. The dye was in our pockets.

"Are you also getting highlights?" I asked.

"Yeah." The said.

"Alright." As me and Alice worked, they talked to each other and Ro.

"Did you see how that kid was dressed? The cape? Oh, my God!" Now, that pissed me off, being friends with "the cape kid", as I am, so I started to hum "The Pink Panther".

As we finished washing out the hair dye from their hair and started putting the highlights in, I whispered to Ro "Go get the camera from E's bag and get ready to take their picture when we finish the highlights. Okay?"

"Yeah, okay." She said, walking off to get the camera. Then we finished the highlights, and walked over to Ro.

"How does it look?" Liz and Emily asked Ro.

"Great!" Ro stated, just before taking their picture.

"Is it really that good?"

"Are you kidding me? Yes!"

"We gotta go show Jenny!"

"Is she here?"

"Yeah."

"Oh, my God! Go find her, now! She'll love it!"

"Alright!" They said as they ran out, without even looking at Liz's lime green and bright red hair, or Emily's purple and orange hair. They didn't even look at each other's. By that time, Bella's hair was fixed.

"How does it look, Alice?" Bella asked, nervously.

"Amazingly normal!" Alice exclaimed.

"Thanks…?"

**Bella's POV.**

"No problem!"

Just as Alice answered me, Eowyn walked in. I wonder where she had gone….

"They are the laziest people alive!" she exclaimed. She was mad. She was ranting inaudibly then.

"What happened?" Teagan asked.

"Ugh… nothing, forget it. I don't care anymore. I hate my job, I really do!" More ranting.

"Um… alright?" Ro stated. I wasn't sure if it was a question or not.

"I missed that, for them! Great! My great plan, ruined!"

"Hey, you know what?" Teagan began. "Shut up!" Eowyn glared at her. "The plan worked, you just didn't execute it like you wanted to."

"Shut up!" E yelled at T.

"Ugh, Fine. Be that way." Teagan mumbled almost inaudibly. I was pretty sure we weren't meant to hear it at all. But, she's kind of a bad whisperer. Okay, she's a really bad whisperer. But then again, she wasn't exactly whispering…. Um… so yeah, enough with the whisper rant. Then she started to hum "The Pink Panther" and stopped. Lloking cautiously over at Eowyn. Eowyn glared back and grabbed the back of her neck, strangling her.

"What did I tell you!" She shouted.

"I forgot! I forgot!" Then she turned calmly to me and Alice, like her getting stragled was a normal, everyday occurance. "You guys wanna come to lunch with us?"

I looked at Eowyn and Ro, making sure that they didn't mind her asking us. They didn't sseem to. Then I looked at Alice quickly. She was grinning. "Your choice." She said too quietly for them to hear her.

"Um… sure. Where do you want to go?" I asked.

Both Eowyn and Teagan looked at Ro. "Same as usual?" they asked in unison.

"Sure." Ro replied. "And you two need to stop soing that."

"Alright." I wondered what "the usual" was for them….

**A/N: Sorry that this was so short, I just had to post it. Sorry if it sucks. And for the spelling mistakes. And, yes. My getting strangled actually _is_ an normal occurance.**


	6. They're back

**A/N: This is for Thursday Pollum. Since the dye could possibly be seen, let's just say that no one was looking at them, and it was a busy day. And the staff thought they were new, because they had new workers coming in that week. Okay? And I am sooo sorry it took so long to update it!  
**

**Disclaimer: I still don't own any of this. Except my loser little story line. I mean, COME ON! Or Nordstrom Cafe. I don't know if there's one there, but it's FF! Shut up! "And I live across the U.S. so I have no clue what's in the mall. Sorry for those who do. So this is the part where you (the reader) just smile and nod." – Ro. (She told me to put that). The "meh" is also Thursday Pollum's. Not do I own Panic! At The Disco. Or Cartel. Or theor songs.**

**A/N pt.2: I don't know what they have in the Nordstrom Café, so just bear with me. Assume they have whatever I say they ordered. Okay?**

Still Bella's.

_Both Eowyn and Teagan looked at Ro. "Same as usual?" they asked in unison._

_"Sure." Ro replied. "And you two need to stop doing that."_

_"Alright." I wondered what "the usual" was for them…._

"Um… what _is_ the usual, by the way?" I asked, unsure if I could handle anything really… odd. But what else could I expect? They were… odd.

"Oh, you'll see." Ro said deviously. _Oh great..._

"Well, hurry up! Try not to trip." Alice said as she followed them out of the store.

I mumbled something about how it's not my fault I'm so clumsy, when I saw Eowyn trip in front of me, causing me to fall on top of her. "Ow. You okay?" I asked as everyone stood around us laughing at our expense.

"Yeah… I trip… a lot." She laughed, as I helped her up.

"Haha, me too." I laughed. Stupid carpets with all that air on it! Someone could trip over it! cough Meaning me…

"Bella! I told you not to trip!" I heard Alice said, hearing her try to keep the laugh out of her voice.

I mumbled "Shut up…. Stupid vampires and all their gracefulness…. Psh! I need that… not them…. Bastards…."

Eowyn looked at me very oddly. _Shit! Shit! Shit! Shit! She heard me!_ "Wh-what did you just say?" she said, slightly stuttering.

"Uh…." I said as I thought for an answer that could help me right now. _Thanks for nothing, stupid Brain!_ Thank God Teagan and Ro were there, dragging us off to the Food Court.

"So…" Alice began, "what is the usual?"

"Well, it's not exactly the usual, but it is for every time we come here. Nordstrom Café." Ro stated.

"Oh, we were going to go there, anyway." Alice stated.

"We were?" I asked, obviously not told about the plans for eating. The thing she DIDN'T have to do. _I never get told the plans for anything…Bullshit… I swear…_

"Yes. We were. Now shut up. And follow. "Alice stated.

I mumbled, "Yeah, sure, whatever….. be a vampiric beotch….." Once again, Eowyn looked at me. _DAMMIT!_ "Yes?" I asked her calmly.

"Nothing….. Not a thing…." She stated, looking confused and lost in thought.

"Okay…." All of the sudden, Panic! At The Disco's "But It's Better If You Do" started blasting. I looked at Alice, who was staring at Ro and Teagan, who were staring at Eowyn.

"Um…. Shit! I can't open it! There we go. Hello?" she said into the phone.

**Eowyn's POV**

"Hello?" I said into the phone.

"Hi." Allison answered back.

"Ew, loser."

"You're the loser…. Loser." She mumbled.

"What up, dawg?"

"Did you just say that? And nothing. You?"

"En la centro comcerial." I said in Spanish, just because I could.

"Loser…. And cool."

Just then, I noticed everyone staring at me. "What?" I asked them.

"I didn't say anything!" Allison replied.

"Not you!" I said into the phone to the confused Allison.

"Nothing…." Teagan answered. I growled and glared at her. "HEY! That's my job!" she said, angrily. Then she growled at me.

"I meh at you."

"Meh?" Bella and Alice asked in unison.

"Yes. Meh."

**Teagan's POV**

"Well, my ring tone is better!" I stated. As if on cue, my phone went off, blasting Cartel's "Honestly". "See?"

"Meh!"

It was a number I didn't know, so I answered it anyway. "Hello?"

"You bitch!" was yelled at me.

"Um…. Who is this and what did I do this time?"

"Liz and Emily. AND YOU BITCH! WHAT DID YOU DO TO OUR HAIR?"

"First off, how the hell did you get my number, and secondly, HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! BITCH! WHAT NOW!" Then I hung up. "We might wanna go a little faster."

"Um….why?" They all asked in unison.

"That was Liz and Emily. They know."

"Ohhhh. Let's go!" They replied as we rushed to the café.

"Well, this is nice." I said as we reached the café, all out of breath, except for Alice.

"Yes…. Yes it is." We got a table and started to talk.

"So, where are you all from?" Alice asked.

"Hell." I answered.

"Also know as Warwick." Ro said.

"Oh." Alice said.

"And yourself?" I asked them. "Or… selves…? I guess…"

"Haha…. Forks." Bella said.

"Really? That's where we're staying for….. uh… how long?" I said/asked.

"2 Weeks with my aunt." Eowyn stated.

"Really? Awesome." Bella stated.

"Mhm." I mumbled, sipping at a glass of water than was placed there by the waiter. "Thank you." I said as he walked away.

Then, promptly, he returned with a pad of paper. "Hi, my name is Bob. What would you like to drink? " Bob asked politely.

"May I have a root beer?" I asked.

"Why, of course!" Bob said.

"Thank you." I stated.

"Um… lemonade." Bella stated.

Ro stated, "Seltzer, please."

"Diet pepsi." Eowyn said.

"I'll be back in a second." And with that, he walked away.

"I like his name…. Bob." I said, staring into space.

My two frriends just looked away, embarassed of me, but I didn't care. It was fun, and I enjoyed embarassing them…. Greatly.

Soon, Bob came back to our table, drinks in hand. We thanked him, and he asked for our orders, which we gave him, and then walked swiftly away.

"So, what's your family like?" Ro asked Bella and Alice.

"Well, my mom is remarried and I live with my dad in Forks wheil she goes with Phil, who plays baseball. And I'm and only child." Bella stated.

"Well," Alice began, "me and my siblings, Jasper, Emmett, Edward, and Rosalie, were adopted by Carlise and Esme Cullen. Jasper and Rosalie are twins, from Esme's side. She's dating Edward, actually." Alice said, pointing to Bella. At the mention of the name "Edward", Bella smile sheepishly, obviously in love with him.

"What about you three?" Bella asked in a daze.

"Um… well…" Ro began, "I have an older brother, Bryan, and my father is… crazy. My mother is really relaxed."

"I was adopted, too." Eowyn began. "I have two younger sisters and a little brother. They're… odd."

"Let's see…. I have four older brothers, my parents are divorced, my father ignores us, and my mother… well…. She's my mom. They're so very… intresting, apparently." I finished.

"Wow." Alice said.

Just then, Bob came back with the salads that we all, except for Alice, ordered. "Not ungry, Alice?" We had asked before. She had said that she wasn't.

**Ro's POV**

We started to eat and laugh, sharing family stories, such as the time Teagan's brother ate a can of crisco, or the time where Eowyn did a face-plant into some rice. Just then, we heard, "THERE THEY ARE!" being yelled from across the room.

"Uh-oh…" We all said in unison.


	7. Dancing on Tables

A/N: First off, I AM SO SORRY THAT I HAVEN'T UPDATED IN SO LONG!!! I've just been really stuck on it. Bob is from St. Bob's Cathedral in Pompeii. (And no, that is NOT a real cathedral. E and I made it up.) Just wanted you all to know that. Secondly, try not to penalize me for bad grammar. I'm bad at spelling. DEAL WITH IT. cough And there actaulyl is a story behind the "pants" and "my phone doesn't talk" thing. Ask if you want to know. Nor do I own the Camelot Song, or Monty Python.

**Still Ro's POV**

"Crap…" I began. "Well… what to do?"

"Run?" Was Bella's first thought.

"No, what fun is that?" Teagan said. Only she would think that this is fun. The psycho…

"Um… well, then…." I said, looking aroud the room.

"let's just wait to see what happens!" Teagan said. "maybe…. Maybe…. Um… I don't know…"

"Teagan…. Come over here for a moment, please," Alice said quietly. Liz and Emily still had a mob of people to get through, so they had time.

"okay." Teagan agreed readily. "What's the plan?" She asked, automatically assuming there _was_ one.

"Well, okay," Alice began.

**Alice's POV**

"You go to that side of the café, and I'll stay here. We're going to create a diversion so they can get out," motioning to the rest of the table, "and just meet up wth them somewhere later on, okay?"

"Score! I love diversions! I mean….um… yeah…" she said as she got up and darted to the other side of the room. When the two girls were close enough, I gave her the signal, and she started to yell nonsense, such as "I did not say PANTS!!!!" and "My phone was not talking!!", that made no sense to anyone… except maybe her…

The girls stopped and watched as their fellow school companion's mockery of etiquette. She jumped on to a table and started to sing, at the top of her very loud lungs "The Camelot Song" from Monty Python, which just happens to be one of her favorite movies. The unfortuante occupants of the table looked horrified as she started to do an Irish jig. Why? That's the only dance she could do well.

"We're Knights of the Round Table. We dance whene'er we're able. We do routines and chorus scenes With footwork impeccable!!" The Irish jig soon turned into the Russian dance that I don't know the name of. Then she started to scream, in a Cockeny accent, "COME ON DOVER! MOVE YOUR BLOOMIN ARSE!" and other things to that effect in different accents, doing random dances that she was fairly good at.

While all of this was going on, I was ushering Bella, E, and Ro out the door, waiting for the right moment to signal Teagan to go. When she was finally looking at me and the other 3 were out, I signaled her. She took a deep bow and, before jumping off the table and running like hell, she said one final goodbye.

"Thank you, thank you. Please, please, no need to be so gracious!" She said to a silent room. "I must be going now, really, I must. Thank you so very much for this grand opportunity! Goodbye!" She yelled, jumping off the table and running. Everyone just sort of… looked at eachother, confused.

As we ran out, we all started laughing hysterically as Teagan's previous actions. The two girls hadn't followed us… yet. They would eventailly though, as we all knew, especially since I had seen it in a vision. But, for now, they hadn't.

I was whispering to Bella that I had a vision about Liz and Emily. She had said, "Damn vampire senses…" E had heard her, and turned to stare at her…

_Not again!_ I scolded Bella in my head.


	8. Attracting the Psychos

**A/N:** This is Marc Demi, formerly known as Thursday Pollum. I am totally hijacking Willbobshaloem's name right now. Do not mind any randomness that you may encounter here. Willbobshaloem is still alive and well. She's sitting right next to me shaking her head and thinking, well at least I THINK she is thinking "Oh god, why?". She's doomed. And she says that she's thinking that "Just a little." By the way, you're doomed too. Oh and have a condom ready, for we will rape your mind...BUT YOU NEVER SAW THAT...okay?

**Willbob**: I apologize for not updating. I kinda forgot about the story, and when I did remember, I couldn't think of what to write. Don't kill me.

Disclaimer: We don't own this, Stephenie Meyer does. But I'm thinking about stealing Willbob's mind since she steals MINE so much.

* * *

E's POV

_Wait, what? Vampire? I mean, I had an inkling. from the last time, but, what?! _

Alice told us over the noise, "Let's go. _Now._" She was the most stern I'd seen her.

"Yeah... Okay." We all agreed, wanting to get out of there as quickly as possible. As we looked outside, there was a slight drizzle, not surprising for Washington,we had no umbrella. Oh well. No time to waste. Both our cars we close each other's, so we decided to walk together to them. As soon as we stepped outside, and we a slight way away from the mall, the clouds moved, though it was still raining, and the sun shone the brightest it's been in days.

Suddenly, I heard Bella and Alice say, "Oh shit..." I turned them and saw Alice all -sparkle sparkle-ie.

"What the fuck...?" I asked them. "What's the hell's going on? Why are you... shiny?"

Alice screamed, "I AM NOT!!! YOU LIAR!"

"Um... are you all right...?" Teagan asked.

"No, she is not. Let's go back to the house, and uh... discuss this a little more," Bella suggested.

"Lead the way." I stated.

"But wait, what about Ro?" Bella asked, looking around for her.

"Eh, screw her. She should of ran faster. She's a bitch anyway. She has her car," Teagan and I said.

"Uh... okay...?"

"Hey, want a twizzler?" Teagan asked, offering them out of no where. "What?" She said to the odd looks.

* * *

_At The Cullen House_

"Well, care to elaborate?" I asked them as we arrived at the large house.

"I will, I will," Alice said. She was driving, and we had gotten back in a little over 20 minutes. "Just give us a moment."

We went inside the house, and we saw a blur come down the stairs, that ended up being... human, I think.

"What's going on?" The beautiful blonde asked Alice.

"Um... yeah... It was sunny..." She said as if it explained it all. Which, to the other woman, I guess it did, because she said no more.

"Rosalie," said another man who came to the room.

"Oh, Emmett. Um... Let's... go. Jasper!" Rosalie called. "Come here."

"Yes?" Another man asked. They were all so beautiful, so... perfect.

"We have company. They're... human. And they know something."

"I'll just tell them. We're vampires. The sun doesn't burn us, it makes shine. Garlic and crosses don't kill us. We don't sleep in coffins. We only drink animal blood, though many do drink human blood. We're 'vegetarian' vampires. Heh..."

"Oh, I get it. You're all fucking crazy. Let's go..." Teagan and I said.

As we were leaving, I heard Jasper say, "That went well. Well, at least our secret's safe."

* * *

_Outside the House_

"Expect us to attract the psychos," Teagan said.

"Yup. But you know... What if it was true..?"

We looked at each other.

Then laughed.

**The End**

Sorry it ended so... badly. I know it sucks. I know it does. I just can't think of any more.

Sorry...

I'll have a new story up soon, but it has nothing Twilight. I'm not sure it has to do with any story yet, it's just something I wrote.


End file.
